I’ll Have What She’s Having Book Review and Book Summary
Have you ever admired someone living life confidently on their own terms and wished you had some of that spark? Chelsea Handler’s latest book, I'll Have What She's Having, dives deep into her journey toward becoming exactly the woman she always envisioned.
Chelsea's Journey to Self-Discovery
In her seventh book, Chelsea Handler shares intimate reflections and candid stories from her life, exploring how she evolved into the confident, resilient person she is today. From spiking her lemonade stand with vodka at age 10 to dealing with setbacks early in her comedy career, Handler’s journey is a blend of humor, vulnerability, and wisdom.
Reader Reactions and Reviews
Readers on Goodreads note a clear shift in Handler’s style, appreciating her move from her earlier party-girl persona to a more reflective, introspective approach. Her openness about therapy, personal growth, and life’s uncertainties deeply resonates with readers. Many describe the book as inspiring, relatable, and filled with valuable life lessons, despite some feeling it leans toward self-help rather than pure comedy.
Key Themes in the Book
Becoming Who You Want to Be
Chelsea emphasizes that true success is not about material achievements but about becoming the best version of yourself. She encourages embracing personal choices, even when they defy societal expectations about marriage, motherhood, or lifestyle.
The Power of Vulnerability and Therapy
Handler openly discusses her transformative experiences with therapy, stressing the importance of self-awareness and continuous self-check-ins. A central idea in the book is reconnecting with the authentic self—the person you aspired to be before life intervened.
Aging and Empowerment
Turning 50, Handler finds empowerment and confidence, countering common fears about aging. She celebrates wisdom, experience, and independence, challenging societal norms and offering reassurance that life's different phases bring their own strengths.
Female Empowerment and Solidarity
Chelsea underscores the significance of women supporting women, advocating honesty, kindness, and mutual encouragement. A powerful anecdote involving Jane Fonda highlights the impact of honest feedback and genuine support among women.
Resilience Through Challenges
Handler's resilience shines through as she describes career setbacks, such as bombing at a comedy festival, only to bounce back stronger. Her philosophy—"I'm no longer in the business of missing rainbows"—reflects her approach to viewing setbacks as opportunities.
Handler’s Reflections and Advice
Reflecting on her younger self, Handler would advise: "Hold on tight, it's going to be a bumpy ride, and everything you ever dreamed about is going to come true." She emphasizes acceptance, patience, and the power of appreciating personal growth and accomplishments.
Final Thoughts and Reflections
I'll Have What She's Having is more than just an entertaining memoir; it’s a reflective guide encouraging readers to embrace their personal journeys, be unapologetically themselves, and find joy in both connection and solitude.
As you reflect, consider this: Who was the person you dreamed of becoming when you were younger, and what steps can you take today to embody more of that vision? Are there "rainbows" in your life you might be overlooking?
Chelsea Handler’s honest and humorous exploration offers a thoughtful invitation to self-discovery, empowerment, and embracing life’s unpredictability with resilience and joy.
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Ever get that feeling, like you see someone just killing it, living life on their own terms, and you think, man, I want some of that.
Totally.
And that's kind of the heart of what we're diving into today with I'll Have What She's Having.
Love the title.
We're talking the one and only Chelsea Handler, comedian, writer, you name it, she does it.
This is actually her seventh book, so she's definitely got a story to tell.
And after today, you might just be running to grab a copy.
It's a super interesting look at, well, her and how she got to where she is today.
A whole journey of personal growth.
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So settle in, and let's get right to the heart of today's book.
She'd probably mention she's really open in this book, talks about some stuff from her past, like some experiences with substance use.
So, you know, just a heads up if that's something you're sensitive to.
Right on.
So what we're really trying to get at today with this deep dive is the core of Chelsea's journey, like how she became the woman she always wanted to be.
It's full of these aha moments, you know, and just genuine wisdom she's picked up along the way.
And it sounds like that journey started early.
I mean, even as a kid, she had this vision of who she wanted to be.
Strong, confident, the kind of person who could light up a room and make everyone feel better.
Oh, and make a living, just being herself.
And like a survivor, that's huge.
Right.
And you can almost see that drive in this crazy story from when she was 10.
Had a lemonade stand, but get this, she spiked it with vodka.
Wait, what?
Yeah, to boost sales.
And then she used the money to buy herself a first-class plan ticket, left her family and coach.
Seriously, 10 years old.
Yeah, no kidding.
Talking about an entrepreneur in the making, right?
And clearly she wasn't afraid to do things differently.
But of course, it wasn't all smooth sailing.
Like anyone, she had some bumps early in her career.
Yeah, she moved to LA like so many people in entertainment do.
But she actually talks about getting fired from a temp job, for not knowing how to transfer calls.
It's kind of funny, but also reminds you that everyone starts somewhere.
Totally.
I mean, even someone as successful as Chelsea Handler had those moments.
She also talks about a not so great performance in Montreal early on in her comedy career.
Probably a bummer at the time, but sometimes those things are the best learning experiences.
Okay, so let's talk about this title.
I'll have what she's having.
I mean, instantly you think of that scene from When Harry Met Sally.
So good.
But I read that Chelsea was actually a little hesitant about using it at first.
Yeah, I get that.
I mean, it's such a famous line.
She thought it might come across as like a little too self-important or something.
Totally.
But her editor and other people she trusts were like, no, this is it.
It captures the whole vibe of the book.
And Chelsea's own take on the title has kind of evolved too.
Now, she sees it less about wanting what someone else has, like material stuff, and more about wanting to become the person you aspire to be, and not apologizing for it, like just going for it.
I love that.
What do you think is so powerful about that interpretation?
Well, it takes this idea of like wanting things and flips it.
It's not about the stuff, it's about becoming the best version of yourself, and it's on your own terms.
You know, she also talks about how it's okay to live a life that's different from what society expects, whether that's marriage, kids, whatever.
It's about making your own choices.
Right.
And a big part of that for Chelsea has been therapy.
She's super open about how much it's helped her grow, become more self-aware.
Yeah, she talks about using therapy to really get to know herself, and then working to change the parts of herself that weren't so great, you know, for her or other people.
And one thing she does every day is ask herself this question, what am I doing and is this okay?
It's like a constant check-in to make sure she's on track.
It's so simple, but so powerful.
Yeah, right.
Totally.
Yeah.
And she admits she doesn't always get it right.
But the difference now is she understands herself so much better.
Which brings us to another key idea she talks about.
She says that, like, deep down, who we are is there when we're kids, before the world kind of, as she puts it, shits on you.
Life gets in the way, and she thinks it's our job to try and get back to that person we dreamed of being.
Wow, that's deep.
And speaking of getting older, she just turned 50.
What were her thoughts on hitting that milestone?
She actually talks about feeling really empowered, grounded, but still confident.
Like, she's got this sense of caring and empathy that's maybe grown over time, but she's still tough, you know.
I can definitely see that.
Yeah, she's excited about this next chapter, feeling like she can handle anything, and she loves her freedom.
Makes it clear that not being married was a choice and the right one for her.
So, knowing everything she knows now, what advice would she give her 25-year-old self?
She actually said it would be.
Hold on tight, it's going to be a bumpy ride, and everything you ever dreamed about was going to come true.
That's amazing, like, reassuring, you know.
Totally.
Yeah.
But she's also honest about the things she still struggles with, like her temper.
She admits to wanting to react negatively to people she thinks are, well, stupid, but she's working on having more sympathy for them instead.
That's growth right there.
Does she talk about any surprises that have come with getting older?
Yeah, she was surprised to realize that she's actually achieved a lot of what she wanted in her 20s, like in terms of looks, success, her friends, her family.
So she's living the dream, in a way?
Kinda.
And what's funny is she didn't expect to feel so good at 50.
Thought she'd be slowing down, but she feels like she's just getting started.
And for other women who might be worried about aging, what does she have to say?
Well, she emphasizes that everything is temporary.
Good moods, bad moods, the ups and downs, they all pass.
So her advice is, don't overreact, you know?
Just try to stay even keeled.
Solid advice.
Right.
And she says it's so important to appreciate how far you've come and to embrace your age.
To her, getting older is like badass.
You've got all this wisdom and experience.
So this book, I'll have what she's having, it's been called her most vulnerable and introspective yet.
But I heard it was actually going to be about something else entirely.
Yeah, she was planning to write about her relationship with Jo Koy.
Oh, interesting.
But then they broke up and she and her editor decided to go in a different direction.
More about what it means to be a woman in the world today.
I see.
So it gets it to sisterhood, being there for other women, but also staying true to yourself.
And there's this real emphasis on women supporting each other.
Like it's not a competition.
I love that.
Yeah, she really believes in the power of women coming together.
And she shares some really powerful stories to illustrate this.
Like there's this one about Jane Fonda, who actually called Chelsea out on some bad behavior at a party, and it really affected her.
Wow.
Yeah, Chelsea realized she needed to listen and not be defensive.
And she wants to be the kind of woman who does the same for others, tells them the truth, even when it's hard.
I think that speaks to her work ethic too.
She's always doing a million things.
Touring, specials, podcasts, Vegas residency, and now this book.
Where does she get all that energy?
She says she just loves to work.
She likes the lifestyle and she loves connecting with people, having an impact, and she's proud of being a hard worker.
She's actually pretty competitive, but mostly with herself.
Yeah.
Like she's always pushing to do better.
It's inspiring, honestly.
And it's helped her be resilient too.
Like there's this story about her bombing at the Montreal Comedy Festival.
I mean, that's got to be rough.
But then right after that, she got a huge TV deal.
Talk about a turnaround.
Exactly.
And it shows her philosophy.
Even when things are bad, keep your head up.
Because something good might be right around the corner.
She says, I'm no longer in the business of missing rainbows.
I love that quote.
Me too.
And she even applies it to personal stuff.
Like she had this shoulder infection that needed surgery.
But instead of being all bummed about it, she decided to see it as a sign from the universe to like slow down and rest.
So important.
Reframing those challenges.
Absolutely.
Now friendship is clearly a big deal for Chelsea.
What does she think makes a good friend?
Honesty.
Being able to tell the truth even when it's tough.
And showing up for people even when you don't feel like it.
She doesn't have much patience for selfish friends.
Yeah, to her, a good friend puts others first.
Especially when things are hard.
It's about being there for them no matter what.
It's interesting though, because for someone with such a busy social life, she also talks a lot about the importance of being alone.
Right.
You might not expect that from someone who's always surrounded by people.
But she's learned to love spending time by herself.
And she credits therapy for helping her realize that always having an entourage was partly a way to avoid being alone with her thoughts.
Makes sense.
Now, she values that time alone to think, to understand herself better and even to be more creative.
And what about love?
Is she still open to finding someone?
Oh, definitely.
She says being in love is fun.
She likes being loved as long as it's not like suffocating.
And she's open to it happening again.
But she also has a healthy approach to breakups.
Like she doesn't try to hold on to people who need space.
She says, let go of what doesn't want to be with you, but end things gently, leave the door open.
That's wise.
So what are people saying about, I'll have what she's having.
What's the buzz?
Well, on Goodreads, it has an average rating of Goodreads, average rating not specified in sources.
And a lot of the reviews talk about how different this book feels compared to her earlier work.
How so?
A lot of people notice a shift away from that, like party girl persona.
And more towards someone focused on therapy and personal growth.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Some people miss the, like, totally unfiltered humor and say this one feels more like self-help.
But then a ton of people say they really appreciate her evolution.
You know, they talk about how she seems kinder, more humble, more thoughtful.
Like she's grown up.
Totally.
And those themes of self-reflection, self-awareness that really resonates with people.
Some people said it felt more like a collection of stories than one big narrative.
I can see that.
Yeah.
But overall, people found it inspiring, relatable, and full of good life lessons.
And they love her honesty and vulnerability.
The audiobook is really popular too because she narrates it herself.
Cool.
Yeah.
Some people still found it funny, but others said it wasn't as consistently funny as her other books.
But there's a lot of talk about kindness, finding happiness, helping others, and just like making people think about their own lives.
And a lot of people really connected with her stance on being child free by choice.
And the ending, some people call it a love letter to herself, which is really sweet.
There's a quote from the book that I think really sums it up.
There's a woman I want to become, Chelsea Handler thought as a child, she'll be strong and confident, she'll light up a room and spread that light to make others feel better.
She'll make a living being herself, she'll be a survivor.
It's like that quote is the whole book in a nutshell.
A lot of people have said they found this book really helpful for thinking about their own lives, for working on themselves, for finding those life lessons, but in a funny way and just feeling more empowered in their own journeys.
As we wrap up this deep dive into I'll have what she's having, what are the big takeaways?
I think it comes down to Chelsea's journey of self-discovery, like finding the courage to be vulnerable, the power in connecting with other women, but also in being alone and her changing views on love, getting older, and just figuring out what it means to be happy.
It's a cool mix of her classic humor and this deeper, more reflective side.
Totally.
So here's something to think about.
Remember that person you dreamed to be coming when you were younger, what were they like, and what can you do even today to become more like that person, and what rainbows might you be missing in your own life?
If you want to hear more about all of this and Chelsea's incredible story, definitely check out I'll Have What She's Having by Chelsea Handler.
You can find it wherever books are sold.
And that's a wrap on our deep dive.
See you next time.
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